SOME people MAY assume that a recipe of mine containing crab might contain me squealing ‘I GOT CRABS!’ in an over-excited, childish manner.
They would be right.
I GOT CRABS!
I’ve also got the second stage in trying to like fish.
This basically involved adding so much to the fish, it no longer actually tasted much of fish.
And also delicious.
And well, the only other fishy thing I have taught myself to like thus far has been a posh fish finger from M&S.
If I’m honest, that wouldn’t make much of a blog.
So give it a go. Its tasty stuff!
Line up your ingredients: a tin of crabmeat (GET YOUR CRABS), some fish sauce, a potato, a lemon, a chilli, some garlic, ginger and coriander.
You will also need oil and a smidgen of flour.
I thought I’d give your imagination a workout.
Peel and quarter the potato.
Cook it up. Cook it up GOOD.
Or, until its tender.
While the tater is doing its thang, peel and grate the garlic and ginger.
And finely chop the chilli.
Mix these in a bowl with the zest of a lemon, and the coriander all chopped up.
No, I didn’t do a lemon OR a coriander picture.
It’s like a public service I offer here.
Drain the crabmeat so its super dry.
As in, all the liquid has gone, not that its wearing one of those coats that every spide and their mother seem to possess.
That only makes sense if you are from Northern Ireland.
The rest of you can concentrate on GETTING YOUR CRABS READY.
Dump your crabs into a bowl.
I’m trying to think of jokes.
Throw the potatoes into the spicy crab.
You know, running out of jokes is probably a Very Good Thing.
Add the fish sauce.
Crabs. Fishy sauce.
It’s like being a teenager over again.
Mash the whole lot up as best you can.
Pretend the mix is me, making dodgy, inappropriate, STI-related ‘jokes’.
It might help to agitate your mashing.
Form into little BALLS.
Fishy balls? Crabs?
I DO NOT NEED JOKES. THEY ARE ALREADY MADE.
Flour the balls a bit.
And then fry them up in some oil.
No photos of oil, either.
Imagination. Workout. Remember?
When they are nice and brown, flip over.
Cut the lemon you zested earlier into wedges.
And serve with the fishcakes. I drizzled sweet chilli sauce over the top, and served with plain rice and stir-fried greens.
MRS P HAS CRABS Spicy crabcakes
Serves 2. Cooking time 20-30 minutes.
1 tin crabmeat
1 garlic clove
1cm piece ginger
1 red chilli
1 tbsp fish sauce
1 tbsp plain flour
Vegetable oil, for frying
2 tbsp sweet chilli sauce, to serve (optional)
1. Peel and chop the potato into small pieces.
2. Cook the potato until tender.
3. While the potato cooks, peel and grate the ginger and garlic into a bowl.
4. Finely chop the chilli and coriander.
5. Zest the lemon, and combine in a bowl with the ginger, garlic, ginger and corainder.
6. drain the crabmeat and add to the spices.
7. Add the potato, mashing well.
8. Shape the mixture into small cakes, dusting with flour.
9. Heat the oil, and fry the crabcakes for 2-3 minutes each side, until brown.
10., Serve, with lemon wedges and chilli sauce.